Wednesday, January 11, 2012

22 weeks!

It isn't getting any easier to take a self-portrait, but one thing is true, the little munchkin is growing like crazy and I'm starting to feel like a real pregnant lady. In the 18 week pic, I was wearing a normal shirt ... but those days are done. I finally put all of my regular shirts away and will see them again sometime this summer. Over the past four weeks, the little one is settling into a bit of a movement routine. If I sit still after eating, it moves around like crazy, but its favorite time to go wild is right as I lay down to go to sleep. The flips and wiggles are peak at about 10 pm, or whenever it is I get to bed, and since I never fall asleep right away anyway, I enjoy every minute of the acrobatics. I know that will change with time (when it's 3 am and I can't get back to sleep because of the crazy internal soccer moves), but for now, I'm just going to enjoy it.

So a very wise friend of mine passed on this link this week, http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem, and I swear it changed my whole outlook on life as a stay at home mom. I think a lot of my growing frustration had to do with the 3 or so months of Piper not napping, being cranky, me being cranky and losing patience as a result, but quite honestly, I was feeling rather strained about motherhood. And I couldn't put my finger on why, but when I read this very well-written and honest blog, I knew what my problem was. I was too busy feeling annoyed/guilty that I wasn't happy all the time that I was missing the really incredible moments. Once I realized what I was doing, it's like a giant light bulb has gone off and I feel refreshed and rejuvenated about parenting. I'm finding it much easier to ignore most of the small stuff, and really cherish what matters. For example, the other day after a shower, Piper and I were in my room putting on lotion (one of her favorite activities). She was doing her thing, I was doing mine, and then she walked over, put a hand on my shoulder and said in an incredibly sincere and beautiful manner, "I love you, Mama." I can't tell you what else happened that day, but that's what I'm going to remember. It was awesome. And because parenthood is super hard, I'm going to choose to focus on those moments and not the ones that make me want to pull my hair out and scream, because there are enough of those too.

And maybe part of my rejuvenation comes from the fact that Piper IS napping again, and I think we've finally figured out a schedule that works well for her. Gone are the days of 1pm quiet time. If we wait until around 3, she almost always falls asleep and then will be a wonderfully behaved and pleasant 2 year old until she goes to bed at 8. This seems to be working well, and thank God, because the no naps and crankiness was a nightmare. And having her drop naps just when I became pregnant again was super crappy timing! Our house is now pleasant again in the afternoon/evening and everyone is so much better off for it. These kids aren't easy to figure out ... and I'm sure the next one will be completely different (and if that means a wonderful napper, then woo hoo!!!).

Here's a recent pic that's one of my favorites. While the smiles are pretty awesome on their own, it's made even more special by the fact that the jumper Piper is wearing was made by my Nana (my mom's mom) and I used to wear it 28 years ago. I'm sure my Nana was smiling down when she saw this too ...